WHY GOD NEVER RECEIVED TENURE AT A UNIVERSITY

1. He had only one major publication.
2. It was in Hebrew.
3. It had no references.
4. It wasn't published in a referred journal.
5. Some doubt he wrote it himself.
6. He may have created the world, but what has he done since?
7. The scientific community can't replicate his results.
8. He never received permission from the ethics board to use human subjects.
9. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it by drowning the subjects.
10. He rarely appeared in class, but told his students to read the book.
11. Some say he had his son teach the class.
12. He expelled his first two students, offering no appeal to a progress committee.
13. His office hours were irregular and were often held on a mountain top.
14. Although there were only 10 requirements, almost all students failed completely.